{"id":917,"date":"2013-10-20T23:50:25","date_gmt":"2013-10-20T18:20:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cockybox.com\/?p=917"},"modified":"2013-10-20T23:50:25","modified_gmt":"2013-10-20T18:20:25","slug":"dear-indian-women","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/dear-indian-women\/","title":{"rendered":"Dear Indian Women"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"1378888471\"<\/a><\/p>\n

I wish to congratulate you from the bottom of my heart for your new found self-image. The new Indian woman is liberated, powerful, ballsy, daring, commanding, in-charge, leader of the wolf-pack and most importantly driven by this inner radiance of rebel (so so sexy).<\/p>\n

The submarine of sexual revolution under the sea of society has it\u2019s snout peaking out for a glimpse of the sun from deep below. It\u2019s empowering, goose-bump-inducing and down-right the moment we\u2019ve all been waiting for.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s spit into the palm of our hands and shake on it. Gross? How about we squeeze in a tiny hug (a pat on the back, if you may) or a peck on the cheek?<\/p>\n

Gross. Weird. No-fucking-way. No strangers please! Indian men are fucking horny perverts. All they can think of is a \u201cchance\u201d [ludicrous assumptions, right fellas?]. I don\u2019t blame your narrow ways ladies. We\u2019ve earned ourselves a notorious reputation of horny apes with dicks for brains.<\/p>\n

Hey hey hey. The generalization bandwagon is over here by the flags of male chauvinism. Guys, fellow brothers, come on. We haven\u2019t – exactly – built bridges or even shown remote signs of growing up.<\/p>\n

Our past record -together- reflects only super shiny shit stains.<\/p>\n

Too many bad things have happened and women have had to resort to the lowest common denominator- a-deep-seated-generalized-view-of-all-men. We\u2019re screwed. Yep. Rock bottom bitches, is where we\u2019re at.<\/p>\n

Now what? Ladies, you\u2019ve lost faith. But, as a humble request, don\u2019t lose hope. Hold onto that for the few out here ready to lay down their \u201cLouis Vuitton\u201d shirt on a puddle so you can stride over or take a bullet of calories on the dessert table [whatever rocks your boat].<\/p>\n

It\u2019s hot when you play coy.<\/p>\n

There. That\u2019s got one eyebrow kissing your forehead and the other locked square with your cheek-bones. For a few, the one\u2019s I\u2019ve congratulated, kissed and hugged, on you go. The rest, sporting crooked facial expressions, stay behind. Have a drink. Relax. You don\u2019t drink? Ok, take a glass of lemonade. There we go. Much better?<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s my plea.<\/p>\n

If men compliment your eyes, your new shoes, your hair or the fact that you can make us laugh or go weak in the knees or your round-round bum or your athletic body or a beautiful painting you might have made or something you might have written or cooked or built with your very muscular hands and calf-muscles- please don\u2019t take us the wrong way.<\/p>\n

We don\u2019t like sandpaper either unless used to smoothen out the rough surfaces. *Genius line. I\u2019m amazing. Alright. Back to the sexist-like rant.<\/p>\n

I feel, some of you get way to serious about that stuff in your head. Frankly, we\u2019ve got the attention spans of a kuala bear [or perhaps a bag of Cheetos] and before you calculate the repercussions of our comments, we\u2019re thinking about that slice of pizza on our plate.<\/p>\n

Grow up? Why? Do it when you die. Think young.<\/p>\n

Consider our cheap, perverse humour spontaneous, in the moment and please [for-God-sake] don\u2019t take it personally. We\u2019re not rapists or certified by the Institute of Molester Fucks. It\u2019s sick. Trust us. We\u2019re disgusted by distasteful acts of persuasion or any forms of illicit humour ourselves.<\/p>\n

At the same time, I will say this. Once you ladies get to know us a little bit. The rickshaw of emotions charter directly in sync with the chain and pedals. You begin to get our silly ways, our non-discreet humour, or our love for porn and most of all- the fact that some of us treat you like humans first and women after.<\/p>\n

Call it a truce. We\u2019re hear to cheer you up and not get into your pants. Frankly, your pants are way too tight anyways. Peace.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wish to congratulate you from the bottom of my heart for your new found self-image. The new Indian woman is liberated, powerful, ballsy, daring, commanding, in-charge, leader of the wolf-pack and most importantly driven by this inner radiance of rebel (so so sexy). The submarine of sexual revolution under the sea of society has […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_coblocks_attr":"","_coblocks_dimensions":"","_coblocks_responsive_height":"","_coblocks_accordion_ie_support":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-917","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-syng"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/917","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=917"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/917\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=917"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=917"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paulsyng.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=917"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}