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Lemons. A bona fide fable.

Their once was a damsel in distress, all she wanted was a surprisingly long list of things or in other words every god darn thing money could supply. Then there was a man who polished her ego for such filthy desires. Now we only have added to the grumble. Its one reason why men only believe acquisitions should be singular as otherwise we would all have to become crooks. On strolling through a vale topic, like the type we would be accustomed to for the early mornings or late evenings. We certainly felt endowed to reciprocate tantamount. The conviction entirely implicit with which the elementary topic had been focused upon, it certainly fondled with our perceptions. It’s canonical, for it is what all men desire deep down inside to explore the corner off, even if it had to be the bed of the Caribbean Sea. To flirt with the irony of the situation would be far more interesting as well as amusing to our tickle wired mind.

Let’s see what we can do here. Not a chaotic approach as it would convolute us further from an already befuddled truth. So let’s commence our so called ‘bona fide fable’, as it is the reason why we are all here. The day when petrol becomes dirt cheap, would certainly be the day when beggars would become choosers. It’s subjective with some room for generalization. Yet it’s more of a gut-feel rather then some diluted fact. So all men out there have other problems, for petrol and diesel prices are not their only concern. They do need their female counterparts to fill the window of hollowness from which only a snowy day is visible. It’s a stormy snowy day, for to be home alone and not have company to go along with that six-pack would only add to the gloom. For it is the six-pack of beers which we are referring to, since only men on screen get the time to make such ridiculous Herculean looking bodies. Real men take out the trash; they have things on their restless mind which otherwise remain placid. Only if it hadn’t been the long list which these damsels carry in their super duper tiny purses. They do say first impression should only be first impression.

Real men perspire and work industriously so as to savor the fruits of nature. Hair grows on them as leach would be on some bloated pig in mucky slush. No time to dress appropriate, for occasions which otherwise would be far less consuming in themselves. It’s quite a task as their objectives are far beyond the ordinary routine of ‘what shall I wear today’ and oh-my-god-I-only-have-like-400-dresses-and-I-don’t-have-anything-to-wear. Its true men are from Mars but women certainly are from that tiny dot we can see from Pluto opposite our galaxy. It really far away, you’d have had to squint like a moron to see it. That far! Ok so now these so called damsels have had their ways all this while. For what? Not for the reason they can’t do anything on their own, it’s for all that spoon feeding we men have been doing.

Now that these females got sporadic for routine, they decided that let’s become ‘Feminists’. Quite the lucid attempt, as being spoon fed on idealistic terms they slave to follow. They are quite satisfying and pleasurable. On a contrasting note, women make us weak in the knees for more than feasible reasons to believe. They do have a way with making us feel good about being us! It’s quite an ego trip fueled by the suave buttering. Not literally of course. Cause otherwise the content here on would become explicit in nature. So they make us do all the things for them, it’s far better to be on this side. The provider side is a side which does have consequences but for it makes us a superior class. Feminists would find melancholy in such a belief but for it is truly real.

So, we have taken some cases and pampered a few, for it’s all for amusement rather then critical-anal-a-sys. Women want everything a man can give; when the lemon is squeezed till the suns don’t shine it is time for a divorce. For men if the lemon could be dipped in every dish then our palette would certainly remain afresh. So a simple solution is that freshness is ultimately what makes everything stay alive. No! This was not an answer to any question we asked earlier. Its more of a ‘excavation lemon’.

By Paul Syng

PSD is a multi-disciplinary design practice based in Toronto. The studio focuses on a problem-solving approach that can take any form or function.